1. You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.
2. Most people remember to stretch their muscles. Remember your organs are important as well. If you are not careful, you might pull a liver.
3. I like fruit and I like beer. I think fruit in beer is fruity and I am not comfortable with it. If you are comfortable with your beerality, than go for it.
4. A 30 rack is a good value. Two 30 racks is a better value.
5. A good tailgater is a safe tailgater. Always stretch before you drink
6. Judo chops, hip thrusts and arm circles are good ways to get loose for drinking.
7. “He who treats opposing fans that are visiting kindly and offer them beer will in return receive beer when he travels” – Confucius.
8. Giving opposing fans beer is a good way to get rid of skunked beer.
9. It is not a good idea to wear white after Labor Day. It is also not a good idea to wear white while getting pants shitting drunk.
10. Trix may be for kids, but beer and Trix are for big kids.
11. In cold games, you should stretch every hour on the hour or else the beer may freeze in your intestines.
12. Playing flip cup on a weaker team not only makes you a better person, but a better leader.
13. When playing catch in the parking lot, watch out for Porta-Johns, little kids, and trash cans. They play excellent zone defense.
14. Beer helmets were designed for beer, not Jack and Cokes. However, Jack and Coke helmets will get you drunk.
15. I have never had a bad night on Tequila; I have never had a good morning following Tequila.
16. "Brasky drank a full glass of liquid LSD with his eggs. Then he slept for 8 months straight. When he woke he rubbed his eyes and said, 'All in all, I prefer gin."
17. It is important to hydrate while tailgating. Beer is made of up to 97% water.
18. The early bird gets the worm; the early tailgater gets the buzz.
19. You should always start tailgating early. Beer goes well with eggs.
20. If you pass out after a long day of tailgating and feel like the world is spinning, you likely drank too much. Another possible reason could be a spinning bed.
21. Being the man on the moon would be cool. Being the man in the moonshine would be better.
22. Beware of partner stretching. While effective it can be dangerous while drinking.
23. There is no I in team, but thanks to unruly tailgaters, there will always be an F and a U.
24. Camouflage beer koozies are cool. Losing your beer in the woods is not.
25. Telling someone from Pitt to Eat Shit is a good idea. Telling your grandma to Eat Shit is not.
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